Bluer than Blue starting to change, everything fade, i wrote that before, here's an everlasting story. u used to think u were gonna call me tucker. that rhymed with a bad word. I'm andrew instead. drew now. drew what. myself a little story. this is how i write always will be. so, in other news, what is going on with social media these days. so many people are writing things in blogs that no one reads, tweets that become lost in a cloud, the bird flies into an endless sound cloud... where does all the music, the sounds, the writings, the words, go to... or is it all flushed into the everlasting sea where the sad pirates and lonely mermaids wait in misery for the world to slip away, all that's left is space and stars. what is the end goal of all these sounds and words, the context and meanings, analyzed over millions of years, being transcended into different forms of meaning every day? How things have become meaningless in an attempt to understand. I think it is time to simply read what we like, listen to what moves us (makes our hearts, specifically, dance), and understand later. This is not the age of historical fiction or scientific discovery or religious aspirations and persecutions. We have already done this. Like they say, "shoot for the moon, even if you miss, you'll land among the stars"... does that mean we are among the stars now, i mean we already made it to the moon. Or was that just a conspiracy too? Yup, I caught you, you actually believed that was a conspiracy. In truth everything is a conspiracy, which means nothing is. And it is all an illusion which means nothing is. Let me explain. If we are on Earth, maybe it's all a dream, "an inception", right? Well if it is, we still exist somewhere. And wouldn't anywhere WE exist be Earth. Planets are just places we haven't been too. Earth is just a place. stop categorizing, holy cow. why is a cow holy? maybe cuz its fuckin shit is fertilizer. Also, in regards to illusion. we all see what we see. what if we saw nothing. felt nothing. did nothing. were nothing. wouldn't that just be SOMETHING. one thing by the band finger 11 kinda suggested that. i can see it. everything is subjective. everything is objective too. it all is. how it plays out, we will see, common sense and decency, it's all the same to you and me. Colors, back to colors. What is the color of gender. What is the color of mental illness. are these just ribbons we wear. styles we share. black n white. brown. faded jeans. tie dye. spelled it wrong. boy don't be shy. who cares, fit in, stand out. I am saying, and will repeat, that everything, and I mean everything, is a paradox. We live in a time of shelter and fear. When you have everything, you are so scared of losing it. When you have nothing, you have nothing to lose. Why is that the case. Also, it is weird how it looks better to have less, yet when you have less, you want more to show wealth. Yet having wealth looks bad so you give it charity so you look selfless. But then it's just for self image. But then you are caring too much about this and that. Who cares. In the end. When your life ends, who are you? Look yourself in the eyes... I hope everyone reading this knows I am talking to myself... in a positive way... I guess. Unless you are one to judge. On Sex: I masturbated yesterday I felt elevated, mood fluctuated, fulfilled, then dismayed I saw the girl's beauty, lusted for her eyes Watching them on me, as I stripped away her virginity Then lust took over and I was back to being shy.